Valued Core

I made no preparations for this project, this exploration of self and lifestyle in order to achieve simplicity. In part because I have a tendency to put things off until the last moment. Even in college I could be found with books and articles spread around me on my bed, organized in piles of where I thought they'd be most useful, as I created the first digital page for a paper due the next day. Procrastination is a way of life for me in many ways.

The other reason I did not look over the list, or even stare at the first day's thought, so that I could have an idea ahead of time of what I wanted to say or how it could be applied to my life is because I have small two children that keep me busy. In many ways my life could be viewed as simple: I am a stay at home mother of two kids.  But the reality is that I have two small children to care for, my son has been undergoing evaluation for a preschool program he'll start at the tender age of nearly 3, a house I struggle to keep some shade of tidy, a marriage I work hard to cultivate and keep healthy, friendships I try to stay connected with and a desire for professional development in the worst way. Which can be very very far from simple.

It does, however, make the first day's thought easy. For the most part.

Without repeating the question, which other contributors have provided and can be found readily here, I will share with you my list of most important people, things or ideas that will temper the remainder of this journey.

1. My Children
2. My Marriage
3. My Relationship with Others
4. Health Happiness Health
5. Success Career Happiness Feeling Accomplished.

What's interesting about this question is that the first three answers to what I value most were easy as pie. I value the people in my life. I could have simplified the list even further and just put "the people in my life" as #1, I suppose, but I'm not sure it would have made it any easier to figure out the rest of the list.

Health is something that is important to me. My physical and emotional health, although I don't necessarily tend to them as I should, are almost always on my mind for various reasons.

That last one, though, was the hardest to put into words. I desire to be successful in some way that I'm not sure I can properly define. On the surface I link this idea with work, which is why Career was the second term I considered. I am a graphic designer, work that I love and am good at although I am not currently doing much of it professionally. I am a photographer, again something I love and strive to better myself at. Currently I am exploring my lifetime love of imagination and working towards being a published author/illustrator of children's books. And yeah I hope that one of the projects I'm attached to that are out there being considered, or one of the projects I have filed away in my idea book, takes off and gets published and opens the door for further published work, but I'm not looking for fame or fortune.

When I boil it down a bit, what I am seeking is a sense of self-fulfillment. I have many dreams, many areas of interest, and I want to prosper at one of them. This isn't just defined by a professional life though, it includes being a good mother to my children and being a better gardener (the weeds are winning at present), etc.

I want, I think, to feel perfectly happy with my level of achievement with some dream instead of always feeling like I am slipping behind, not quite good enough or not even trying in the first place.

I want to feel like I have finally accomplished something.